You may have heard of a technique called edging that can supposedly lead to stronger orgasms and more luscious, drawn-out sexual experiences. If you haven’t, well, I bet we have your attention now.
But what is edging, exactly? âEdging is a practice where individuals build up arousal until they are close to orgasm, then pause for a short break,â says Dr. Nazanin Moali, a sex therapist and the host of the Sexology podcast. âThe goal is to get as close as possible to orgasm without reaching it.â
The term edging stems from the idea that you will pause stimulation right when you’re on the edge of orgasm, says Anna Richards, a pleasure positivity educator and the founder of the ethical porn site FrolicMe.com. âBy doing this repeatedly, the pleasure sensations build,â she explains. âIt makes the final glorious climax a stronger and more satisfying experience.â
People may practice edging to intensify their pleasure, lengthen their sexual experiences, and introduce an element of teasing to solo or partnered play. So, let’s break down the benefits of edging and how it could improve your sex life, tips for how to try it yourself or with a partner, and a few sex toys that may even enhance the experience. Have fun!
âEdging generally refers to the practice of bringing yourself or a partner to the brink of orgasm multiple times without allowing the climax to occur,â says Dr. Jess OâReilly, a We-Vibe sex and relationship expert. In other words, you or your partner will savor that delicious buildup to climax multiple times before going over the edge.
âEdging can be a solo pursuit through delaying orgasm during solo masturbation moments,â says Richards. âYou may have been experiencing this technique without realizing you were edging. It can feel natural and lovely to keep riding that wave of almost pleasure. Then, when the release finally comes, the orgasm is much more intense than a regular climax.â
What Are the Benefits of Edging?
Drawing Out Sex
Is edging good for you? It can be if youâre looking to have a more intense orgasm or prolong your sexual experiences. The motivation to try the latter is most common among men seeking longer-lasting erections, but women may also want to delay their climaxes too, as many experience hyper-sensitivity that makes stimulation uncomfortable to continue post-orgasm.
âItâs not about suppressing the orgasm but about stretching your capacity to hold pleasure in your body for longer, letting it build and transform into a force of vitality and creativity,â says Josefina Bashout, a tantric sex coach, spiritual psychologist, and the host of the Unabashed podcast.
Improving Orgasms
Like with most things, practice makes perfect when it comes to foreplay. âThe more cycles [of edging] you go through, the more blood flows into your pelvic area,â says psychotherapist and sex therapist Dr. Lee Phillips. âThis helps build excitement and can lead to more powerful orgasms.â Some people also report that the pleasure and orgasm they eventually experience during a sexual encounter or sexual intercourse is more spread throughout their body, says OâReilly.
Adding a Tantric Flavor to Sex
Edging provides the opportunity to experience levels of pleasure you havenât previously experiencedânot just within the bedroom but outside it too, according to Bashout. âTesting the edge is about stepping into the unknown spaces of your body,â she explains. âItâs where your physical sensations meet your emotional boundaries, and your desire for release meets your capacity for restraint. By hovering in this space, youâre not just delaying gratification; youâre expanding your ability to feel moreâmore pleasure, more connection, and more freedom.â
Releasing Pressure
We often think of sex as a rush toward climax, so it can be liberating to take away the goal of orgasm, at least for some time. âEdging turns lovemaking into a playful, exploratory practice,â says Bashout. âIt becomes a discipline and art instead of a race to the finish line, and you can find more enjoyment and de-stress.â Edging allows plenty of time for your arousal to build up so that orgasm flows easily and naturally.
Enhancing Intimacy
Edging not only helps you get to know your own body better but also forces you to become more attuned to your partner, which enhances the emotional connection. âEdging allows us to explore our sexual response and practice control over arousal and orgasms,â says OâReilly. âPartners may use edging to build anticipation, heighten intimacy, and explore dynamics of dominance and submission in a consensual and playful way. Edging can create more intense desire and passion.â
How to Try Edging Alone
Map Your Arousal Scale
The first step to edging is to figure out where your edge is. Bashout suggests doing this by pausing when youâre pleasuring yourself and rating your arousal on a scale from 1-10. When you get to an 8, you are at your edge, she says. This is the point where you stop the sexual stimulation.
Pause and Cool Down
When you reach an 8 on the arousal scale, pause, breathe deeply, and visualize that your breath is spreading the sensation throughout your body. âA tantric tip is to put your hand on your heart, place your tongue on the roof of your mouth when you breathe in deeply from your nose, and relax and release the tongue as you breathe out with an open mouth,â says Bashout. âThis helps you cool down without losing the buildup of arousal.â
Repeat and Rebuild
During each edging session, practice pausing and resuming multiple times. âThis trains your body to sustain arousal for longer and gives you more control over your pleasure,â Bashout says.
